The point of no return
So here we are again. Staring at reality. Knowing that there’s something mysterious between us, about us. Just like a long time ago, when we were standing at some point where return was possible, now it’s a point of no return. The first time we met, there were no doubts, we could go back if we wanted. But now it’s the point of no return. We can’t hop into this and walk out like it never happened, like we could by the first time. I never meant to fall in love with you, however you knew exactly what you wanted. Maybe we were not ready back in the days. Why would you be standing at my door otherwise? It’s making me confused, I don’t know what to do. Sometimes it feels like you’re standing next to me. And when we talk, it’s like we’ve never been apart.
Still, it’s freaking me out. And I know it also freaks you out. Things have changed, we need to take care of it on our own. We should be really carefully, because since the first time, we got to know each other. We feel each other, ever since. It’s something magic.
And now there are choices to be made.
Still both confused, but we also both know that it wasn’t supposed to end this way. We both know there is more to us than we would have ever known. Little by little it shows. Little by little it hurts. Bit by bit, the path will be cleared. The book is not to be closed yet. We are connected, which I guess means that we are still not over.
Add a comment 25/05/2009
Tags: boy, forever, girl, love, together, us, we
Just two ordinary people…
We are tied to each other, distance don’t matter. We don’t need telephones, computers or even the ordinary mail to be delivered by a simple postman with his red caddy. We don’t need all that stuff. We still have that invisible line, that makes us feel and see what we both need. We don’t need words for us to know what the other person feels, one gaze is enough. We can feel each other through concrete walls, see each other by taking just one look at the sky, we can hear each other whisper from miles and miles away. Sometimes it’s like you’re by my side, like you hold me like you always did. And that’s not my imagination and I’m not drunk when I feel it. But I feel it clearly, it’s your touch, your kiss and your face I see in the middle of a crowd you don’t belong to. It’s that bond we have. Not to be resisted, just because we can’t. Maybe we belong to each other, it might be love…
Add a comment 06/05/2009
Tags: bond, boy, friendship, girl, love, mail
Bittersweet memories
There was this great part of her life, the part she was with him. But that’s over, it seems like it’s been forever she last touched him, while it’s only been a few months. Sometimes it even feels like she never met him at all. But there still are loads of memories. Every day there is something that reminds her of him, but she knows that holding on to that memories won’t amount to a thing. Sometimes she thinks he forgot her a long time ago and it makes her feel so lonely. He was the first guy she ever really loved. The first guy she opened her heart to. And she never thought she would lose him, but she did. At first it felt like everything disappeared, there was only the memories. He must have forgotten about her. And it took some time for her to realize that she was his first love too. And that means that he still thinks about her, that he has memories too. At that point she was sure that if they would never get back together, it wouldn’t make any sense. Memories were still there, there was still something they had together, even though there was no love anymore.
Add a comment 19/04/2009
Tags: boy, broken, first love, girl, hurt, love, memories
Alonetime
She knows what’s going on in your head. She knows exactly what you think, what you want, she knows everything about you. She still does.
You didn’t dare to say goodbye, but you did. You told her you two would see each other soon, you would come along. But you never did. Still she is sure you never meant to leave her, you just needed some time on your own. To think things over, to look for what you really needed and to discover if you still loved her. And it took her a while, but she finally accepted you two broke up.
You left her, but still she was everything on your mind. You didn’t want another girl, you only wanted to be alone, to think about what you really wanted, if this was it. She meant the world to you, she clearly did. But you wanted to find out if the love you felt for her, was the kind of love that could last forever. And to make sure you would really miss her. She knew exactly what you wanted at that time, even though it made her so damn insecure. She didn’t know what to think about you. But life goes on, even after heartbreak. And now she also knows you tried everything to forget about her. Because at first you didn’t miss her, you thought you didn’t love her anymore.
You’ve been everywhere, you slept with every girl you met. But you never accepted that every girl reminds you of her. And you didn’t want to accept that she still is the girl you love the most. That you are nothing without her.
Now you finally accept that she’s the only girl for you, that she’s the one you want to live your life with, you only have to tell her.
Just tell her that you want to be with her day and night. Tell her you lost all the doubts. Make your excuses for the time you were gone. For every time she needed you, she wanted you to be by her side, but you weren’t there. Tell her you used all the time to find out that you and her are still meant to be.
And don’t you forget to tell her you never wanted to leave her, that you never meant to run away. Remind her of the air you needed, just to find out that you two are perfect, that you can’t imagine a life without her.
Add a comment 16/04/2009
Tags: back together, boy, Break up, girl, love
The one
And then there’s that boy. He was the one for her, and she was the one for him. But he needed space, he couldn’t handle a relation. She needed more, he wanted less. At least that’s what he thought… So they broke op. The girl felt like torn apart, the boy couldn’t think of anything else but her. But he constantly reminded himself that this was for the best, so he tried to forget and he finally found what he wanted. Freedom, friends, everything and more. But every girl he saw, reminded him of the one. The one he let go of. And every time he was drunk, every girl in the room looked like her. They all looked at him with her big blue eyes. They all seemed to have fun, the same way she always had. But he was stubborn, he still thought this was for the best. And every night, before he went to sleep, he saw her face. He heard her giggle. He felt her touch. Still he thought it was just part of the process, but the process already took months. One day he really saw her, and he got sick. He didn’t know why he ever left her. Still she was beautiful, still she looked happy. Like she never changed at all. Unfortunately she didn’t mention him, he decided that was for the best. But he knew something had to change. He looked at old photos and then looked in the mirror. The guy with the twinkle in his eyes disappeared, he looked unhappy. And finally he knew that’s what he felt for months. At that point he knew, she was all he needed.
Add a comment 11/04/2009
Tags: boys, Break up, broken hearts, eyes, girls, relationships, sadness, space
Mannen en vrouwen
Waarom bestaan er toch eigenlijk relaties tussen mannen en vrouwen? Deze twee geslachten verschillen zo ontzettend veel van elkaar, dat hoe hard ze hun best ook doen, elkaar nauwelijks zullen begrijpen. In onze westerse wereld eindigt ongeveer vijftig procent van de huwelijken in een scheiding en lopen de meeste serieuze relaties spaak voordat ze langdurig kunnen worden. Wat is dat toch? Waarom is het verschil tussen mannen en vrouwen zo groot? Waarom zijn relaties meestal gedoemd te mislukken? Zijn we nu verschillende soorten op dezelfde wereld, of dezelfde soort op verschillende werelden?
Het is begonnen in de oertijd, de vrouwen verzamelden en verzorgden. De mannen daarentegen jaagden en beschermden. Hierdoor zijn de zintuigen van de vrouw veel fijner afgesteld dan die van de man. Zij merkt subtiele veranderingen in stemming en houding onmiddellijk op, de vrouwelijke intuïtie geheten. Mannen moeten eerst duidelijke veranderingen zien, tranen, woede. Soms dringt het niet eens door totdat ze een klap in hun gezicht hebben gehad.
Mannen en vrouwen in een relatie flirten evenveel met anderen, bij de vrouw valt het alleen niet op. Een man draait zijn hoofd meteen wanneer hij een mooie vrouw ziet lopen, ze hebben gewoon een tunnelvisie. Dat is ook de reden dat ze nooit wat kunnen vinden.
Vrouwen kunnen beter liegen dan mannen, ook kan ze een leugenaar van een kilometer afstand herkennen. Mannen, pas op! Lieg nooit recht in het gezicht van een vrouw, maar laat je ook niet beetnemen.
Vrouwen kunnen ook aan de toon van je stem horen hoe je iemand zich voelt, mannen kunnen dit niet. En welke man heeft zich nog nooit verbaasd over de vaardigheden van een vrouw, die meteen de relaties tussen verschillende personen weet te beschrijven, het moment dat ze een kamer binnen stapt. Mannen zij niet ongevoelig voor details, maar ze pikken geen non-verbale signalen op. Mannen hebben het daarom ook niet door als jij ziet dat er weer een sletje met hem staat te sjansen. Hij weet niet waarom ze aan haar haar zit, laat staan dat hij het opmerkt! Beschuldig hem er ook niet van dat hij met haar stond te sjansen, als hij zegt dat hij het niet doorhad, had hij het ook niet door.
En het is nog steeds waar dat vrouwen meerdere dingen tegelijk kunnen, dat is geen onzin, de verbinding tussen de linker- en rechterhersenhelft is gewoon dikker. De mannelijke hersenen zijn in hokjes verdeeld, waardoor ze meestal maar één ding tegelijk kunnen.
Omdat vrouwen hun beide hersenhelften tegelijk gebruiken, vinden ze het moeilijk om hun links en rechts te onderscheiden.
Vrouwen zijn praters, mannen niet. Ze kunnen het niet, ze willen het niet. Mannen kunnen zich gewoon moeilijk in woorden uitdrukken. Echter, wanneer een vrouw haar problemen bespreekt, gaat een man opzoek naar een oplossing. NIET DOEN! Je hoeft haar problemen alleen maar te erkennen, ze wil geen oplossingen. Dat een man zijn problemen tijdelijk aan de kant kan zetten, weten we maar al te goed, het hokjesbrein van mannen creëert de mogelijkheid problemen weg te stoppen.
Dames, wanneer je ruzie maakt met je man, zorg dat je bij het onderwerp blijft, zodra je meerdere verschillende argumenten aandraagt, raakt hij in de war.
Word ook niet boos als hij geen emoties laat zien wanneer je met hem praat, waar wij tien verschillende gezichtsuitdrukkingen laten zien in een conversatie, zal hij dezelfde uitdrukking op zijn gezicht hebben. Dat wil niet zeggen dat hij er geen emoties bij voelt! Het zal je verrassen, maar hij heeft óók emoties, evenveel als wij vrouwen!
En mannen, als jullie eens niets te zeggen hebben zullen we je met rust laten. Maar is een vrouw stil en zondert ze zich af, vraag je dan maar eens heel snel af wat er aan de hand is. Ze zal ongetwijfeld met je willen praten.
Mannen, als je samen met je vrouw of vriendin weg gaat, geef haar geen kaart, koop een navigatiesysteem, ze heeft negen van de tien keer toch geen ruimtelijk inzicht. Zo’n navigatiesysteem scheelt een hoop ruzies. Moet ze alleen weg? Geef haar het navigatiesysteem dan mee, of geef haar een beschrijving met duidelijk oriëntatiepunten als gebouwen, dat is een stuk makkelijker voor haar.
En we weten best dat wanneer het op seks aan komt, mannen alleen maar een plek nodig hebben. Maar mannen, besef dat vrouwen er een reden voor nodig hebben!
Mannen, bezint eer ge begint, een vrouw wil monogamie, die wil geen andere vrouw in het leven van haar man. Vrouwen zullen het ook nooit accepteren en erkennen dat een man liefde en seks gescheiden kan houden, dat gaat voor ons gewoon niet op.
Dames, mannen zullen niet snel ‘ik hou van je’ zeggen, want ze zijn bang dat ze lust en liefde door elkaar halen. En ze willen zich niet binden voor de rest van hun leven, stel dat ze wat missen! Stel dat ze de kans mislopen om met een stel naakte fotomodellen in een bubbelbad te belanden. Maar mannen, get real! Dat gaat toch nooit gebeuren.
Eén pluspuntje gelukkig, wanneer hij eenmaal zegt dat hij van je houdt, zal hij het van de hoogste daken willen schreeuwen.
Dus verdiep je in elkaars geslacht en manier van denken, dan zal het allemaal wel loslopen.
Add a comment 29/03/2009
Tags: houden van, liefde, mannen, monogamie, relaties, vrouwen
You and me
Sometimes is seems like nothing ever happened between the two of us. I don’t remember your voice anymore, I don’t even know what you look like anymore. You left no footprints in my environment, not one. Everything is gone, except the footprint in my heart. I will always carry my thoughts about you with me. Even though our love had passed, there is still something between us, I can’t describe, but we both know it’s still here. But you need to know, I’m fine. I finally know I can make it on my own and sometimes I even forget about you for a little while.
My friends are still around, they take pretty good care of me. They didn’t leave because of my useless stories about missing you, they made me smile again, I couldn’t have done it without them. I changed, I know. There’s still this life I had before we met, it only changed a bit. I enjoy my weekends, flirt with pretty guys, I drink too much. Because you taught me to, I’m not as scared as I was before.
Together we would be a hundred, but forever didn’t last at us. And I’m still alive, I’m doing fine.
But then you come back around, one way or another, surprising me. Just some little things that remind me of you more and more. Those things make me miss you more than you could ever imagine.
Maybe it’s just my imagination, but those things come more and more often, dreams of you, things I hear. I don’t know what to do about it.
Sometimes it even feels like you’re standing next to me, not in person, more like the wind. And even though I thought I couldn’t remember your voice anymore, sometimes I hear you laugh, when I wonder what to do with some technical stuff. Or when I have some problems I still sometimes hear your voice telling me not to make it all so difficult.
I wonder if you’ll ever let go of me, if you ever give me the chance to totally live my own life. Or that maybe you and I are meant to have a life together. Because, you know, maybe it’s not that we’re not meant to be, maybe we were just not yet ready for forever.
I still see you everywhere, but it’s just memories. People walking the same way you did and still do. People wearing the same clothes you used to wear. And memories are everywhere, walking hand in hand, talking about the future. Memories of the beautiful things you once told me.
But our love is over, I’m doing fine, I will never forget you. But please choose, let go of me forever or love me again. Will you forever have the power over me, will I never get rid of you?
Add a comment 27/03/2009
Tags: heartbroken, heartbroken love forget live life memories, love
Dreams
What is life without a dream to hold? Take my hand and never let me go. Dreaming is okay, because dreams have no end. But when there’s that dream you know you can make come true, go for it! What’s there to lose? Because when you want something bad enough, you have to be willing to sacrifice everything. When you want it so bad, fears and doubt don’t mean anything to you anymore. You don’t even think about it anymore, if it will be a problem, you’ll deal with it later. But for now, your dream won’t be around forever, just chase it. And when it comes to problems, it was probably worth it all.
Add a comment 26/03/2009
Tags: Dreams, love
Decisions
I really wonder what it is with boys. They somehow just don’t know how to decide something really important. They don’t seem to know what they’re doing to the girls that really love them.
The girls are usually left, not knowing what to do or to think about what happened. Or only thinking of what they did wrong, even though the boy told that it wasn’t her fault, it was completely up to him. He doesn’t know if he’s ready for the real thing and she doesn’t know how she will ever get over him.
She usually thinks it over until she has no more tears. The boy couldn’t explain what was really going on in his head and the girl finally settles down, knowing she’ll never find an answer, because he probably won’t remember half of what their lives together used to be.
Of course he is still on her mind, every day. But she’s ready to let go, ready to move on, ready to have a life after him. And then, all of a sudden, he’s back.
He shows up unexpected, telling his decision was completely wrong, telling he’s more sorry that anyone in the whole world could ever imagine. That one decision was his biggest regrets, for months already, but he didn’t dare to come back and tell, because he thought she probably forgot about him.
But she didn’t, she never forgot about him and she knows she never will.
He still makes sense, she still crashes when she looks into his eyes. And so does he.
He never forgot about her, because she was the best thing ever happened to him.
But when it comes to making up, they both wonder what’s the use. They were separated for a long time, they don’t share anything anymore. Except their past, they still carry it through their everyday use. They still have that bond, that bond that’s unbreakable. And that bond is most important. They should try it one more time, just because of that bond. Or maybe to finish what they once had. Because both knew it wasn’t supposed to end this way.
But then again, why is it so difficult for boys to decide. They never know what’s best for them. When will they? Will they ever grow up? Will they ever be just like girls, thinking about something before making a decision. Will they ever?
Add a comment 22/03/2009
Love and Lust
There is this line between love and lust. The first thing you share with someone you think you’ll spend the rest of your life with. You would do anything for that certain person, you two have a bond that’s unbreakable. It’s something that goes deeper than anything else you know in this world. That person is able to get the best out of you, that person makes you feel more happy and alive than you could ever imagine. There are so many songs about love, but nobody can ever write down on paper what love really means, what it makes you feel. On the other side there is lust. Because everyone will have a person in their lives who they are truly attracted to. A person they want to hide away from, but when meeting each other, there’s no hiding. There is something that looks like pure love. But they won’t go to the end of the world for each other, just because there are no deeper feelings. Maybe because they know they’re no good to each other. Maybe ‘just because’. Maybe because there are no reasons to love and lust.
Add a comment 15/03/2009